Why Is Diplomacy So Misunderstood?
Intuition and common sense aren't enough to succeed. You need a distinct set of skills that have to be learned and honed.
During my recent book tour for “Diplomatic Tradecraft,” I spoke to audiences in a dozen countries about diplomacy — naturally — but also about empathy. Why? Because nothing makes diplomats more effective than having empathy for the views of others — the ability to see the world through the eyes of their interlocutors. Not to appear nice or polite, but to find ways to work together even with adversaries, and to persuade them to see their interests in a new light.
Regrettably, “effective” is not how I would describe the state of diplomacy today. A large part of the reason for that is a growing empathy deficit in our global society. Developing an ability to empathize takes significant time and sustained effort. It’s not a transaction or a series of transactions. Giving two warring parties a list of demands and telling them that, unless they agree to it quickly, you will “move on” is not diplomacy — at least not in any meaningful or enduring sense — and it’s certainly not the way to end a years-long armed conflict.
Diplomacy is a complex, high-stakes profession with far-reaching consequences — not just for global security and prosperity, but for something much more tangible: our daily lives. Yet it remains deeply misunderstood. Intuition and common sense are not enough to succeed; it requires a distinct set of skills that have to be learned and honed. They include managing a country’s relations with other states, navigating and engaging foreign societies, influencing governments and publics, conducting difficult negotiations, detecting risks and taking advantage of opportunities. As I wrote in the The New York Times, diplomats are made, not born.
At the heart of all these skills is empathy, which is why it tops the list of core skills in “Diplomatic Tradecraft.” Empathy is not synonymous with compassion or sympathy — and it’s not a weakness, but a strategic advantage. How can you influence another country’s policies and behavior if you don’t truly understand its history and culture, the mentality of its people and what makes them tick, the way its government makes decisions and its centers of power?
As Michael Ventura pointed out in a recent op-ed piece in the Times, empathy has a dark side. “Empathy is the ability to understand others’ perspectives — what they feel, what they think, what they fear, what they want. That understanding can be wielded in service of a greater good,” he writes, “or it can be exploited.” Political leaders and diplomats certainly do both as they seek to advance their interests and counter real or perceived threats. I’m talking about leaders who possess this skill set. Many don’t, and that handicaps them. I won’t name names just yet, but in time I will.
Today, I’m launching a weekly newsletter, Diplomacy Notebook. It’s a sibling of Diplomatic Diary, the e-journal of the Washington International Diplomatic Academy (WIDA), the only independent school for practical diplomacy training in the world. I founded WIDA in 2016, after more than a decade of traveling the world as a Financial Times and Washington Times correspondent, during which I witnessed alarming gaps in diplomatic readiness and performance.
I hope the Diplomacy Notebook becomes a place for ideas, discussion and community. Although many other writers focus on world politics, few delve into diplomacy as an activity and a profession, or explore its impact on ordinary people’s lives. I plan to offer analysis and commentary, tell behind-the-scenes stories from the diplomatic front and share advice from experienced diplomats, as well as from leaders in politics, business, culture and education. After all, many diplomacy skills can be very useful in other walks of life. WIDA’s more than 300 alumni from over 50 countries are living proof of that.
Diplomacy Notebook subscribers are eligible for exclusive benefits. They include live chats with me, as well as partial scholarships to WIDA courses and study trips we take abroad to meet with diplomats, other government officials, experts and journalists to understand better how diplomacy works on the ground and discuss current developments.
I look forward to our conversation.
What’s your take?
Why do you think diplomacy is misunderstood?
Leave a comment below.
Nicholas Kralev is the founder and executive director of the Washington International Diplomatic Academy, and a former Financial Times and Washington Times correspondent. His books include “Diplomatic Tradecraft,” “America’s Other Army” and “Diplomats in the Trenches.”
Empathy is key in mutually committed social interactions…your book contributes to where and why empathy is needed in today’s world. Thank you!
This is such an important topic. Thank you for writing this!